Men invented golf and, for that, women are thankful. But these particular pet peeves probably wouldn’t exist if golf were a woman’s idea...
*Please note that this article is intended to be sarcastic and a parody of some common struggles and irritations that golfers face on the course.
Animal droppings would not be classified as “removable loose impediments” (yuck!). Players would be welcome to take a free drop.
There would be no white golf towels... or grips or gloves for the matter. Women know white is almost impossible to clean, especially when it comes to grass stains.
There would be at least four restrooms available on an 18-hole course. Each one would have toilet paper and a door lock that works.
Hats would be allowed in the clubhouse, or at the least, there would be hair products and hair dryers in every ladies’ locker room. Women know what playing 18-holes in a hat does to your hair, and trust us, it’s worse than the look of a hat in the clubhouse.
There would be pleasantly scented water in the ball washer. Essential oils would be nice.
All ball washers would be the rotary crank design. No more plunger action!
Fast-playing women would be invited to play through slow-playing men.
Signposts would clearly show where the next hole is. No more going to the wrong hole. It’s a golf course, not a corn maze.
There would never be cigar ends on the greens. Or sunflower seed shells.
Women would not have created sand traps. They are not pretty. In fact, they look like kitty litter. They’re difficult to hit out of and are often left a mess. Not to mention they leave grit in your socks and golf sandals. No one likes them.
Players would not have to hit out of a divot. Not from the middle of the fairway. EVER!
No one would play with those obnoxiously big poker chip ball markers, especially within three feet of the hole.
The forward tees would have never been called the “ladies tees.” Women may have called them the “Par-Tees!” Many golfers will likely have more fun shooting lower scores from the forward tees!